I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
