Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
they're like a gay fantastic four
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
