One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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