butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
