I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Randomize
