i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
