I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Randomize
