Heybabeimwearingurpanties
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
