I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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