You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
