Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
