if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
