Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
