I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Drunk is not a location!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
