i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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