Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize