we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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