Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
either way he was missing a nipple.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
