I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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