its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
