get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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