You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
