The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Found your dick twin last night
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Randomize
