Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
This baby is an asshole
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
