I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
