a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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