I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
