just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Randomize
