ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
