Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
