The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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