so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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