Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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