Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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