so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
