is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I love you.
Bad choice
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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