Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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