I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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