hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm gonna fight the coyote
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
