she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
there is glitter all over my balls
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