So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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