what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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