I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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