I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
