I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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