doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
