I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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