Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
