Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
