I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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